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eHarmony: Why date a lawyer?

Posted by: Laurence Simons 21/08/13

Popular dating website eHarmony has launched a ridiculous selection of reasons for going out with someone who works in the legal services industry. As with all of these features, you can safely infer that the unstated number one in the list is 'a crippling fear of dying alone, with nobody discovering your body for three weeks'.

One might hope that the site has compiled some useful advice on dealing with the long hours, stress and pressure that come with reaching the pinnacle of the profession, maybe along with some helpful guidance on establishing a good work-life balance and ensuring that you don't allow your career to wholly define your personality.

Except one would never hope that, because eHarmony is a moderately-popular, no frills dating service and not the New York Times.

Highlights of its list include "quoting your date will make you sound smarter", "most lawyers are fantastic dressers" and - seriously - "there will be plenty of free legal pads around".

Free legal pads! If you're basing your dating decisions on what kind of stolen office supplies you might be able to grift from the relationship before it inevitably descends into bickering and sadness, why not go out with someone who works in WH Smiths?

And not to engage in too much close reading of an article that was presumably written on the back of a cigarette packet at three AM, but suggesting that most lawyers are snappy dressers is to ignore the armies of unshaven, blue-shirted men across the UK currently staring at legal reports and rubbing their faces.

This insightful journalism follows the news that a Tumblr site ranking the hottest male barristers in London is set to launch a female equivalent of rankings.

Journalist Sonia Van Gilder Cooke and art historian Natalia Naish, both of whom are Americans living in London, told the Lawyer magazine they had some reservations: "Because women are still judged on their appearance on a daily basis, they don't particularly need anything else to remind them of our lookist society ... But we don't like the idea that women barristers are not powerful enough to withstand a hottie list."